The Reality of Reality TV Love: Lessons from Rachel Lindsay and Bryan Abasolo’s Divorce
Written By Lyla Evans // EEW Magazine
In the world of reality TV, viewers are swept up in meticulously crafted storylines, lavish romance, and high-profile public appearances. But as women of faith, we know that building a solid relationship requires far more than on-screen glamor.
Genuine relationships are rooted in prayer, communication, dedication, and a commitment to navigate life's challenges together.
Rachel Lindsay, 39, and Bryan Abasolo, 44, fan favorites from season 13 of The Bachelorette, seemed to have it all. Their love story unfolded on TV, culminating in a romantic proposal in Spain that had viewers glued to their screens.
Rachel, who made history as the first Black Bachelorette in 2017, chose Bryan, a Miami-based chiropractor, over Peter Kraus, a personal trainer from Wisconsin.
The couple's engagement was celebrated during the August 2017 finale, and they tied the knot in a dreamy rooftop wedding at Mexico's Royalton Suites Cancun on August 24, 2019.
However, their fairy-tale romance did not stand the test of time. After four years of marriage, Bryan filed for divorce from Rachel, citing their separation date as December 31, 2023, and requesting spousal support.
Fans were heartbroken and shocked as the truth behind their seemingly perfect relationship began to emerge.
In new court documents obtained by Us Weekly, Rachel candidly revealed the struggles they faced during their brief marriage. "Our marital standard of living was nowhere near as glamorous as Bryan portrays it to be," she stated. "In fact, we rarely saw each other or even lived together during our brief marriage."
The documents disclosed that while their season of The Bachelorette was airing, Bryan quit his job as a chiropractor in Florida, and Rachel continued practicing law in Dallas. Bryan later moved to Los Angeles in an attempt to "make it in Hollywood" while they were still engaged.
Meanwhile, Rachel's career in the entertainment industry took off, leading her to quit her law firm in 2018 and pursue opportunities in radio, podcasts, and television. This caused them to spend even less time together, as she constantly traveled for work.
Rachel also revealed that they "rarely went out together and did not even go on monthly dates." They maintained separate finances, never shared a joint bank account, and were responsible for their own expenses, including credit cards, retirement accounts, and brokerage accounts. Even before moving to LA in 2020, where Rachel became a correspondent for Extra, they split all household expenses.
They were living separate lives in every sense, while the public swooned and marveled over their seemingly blissful romance and tight-knit union. Beyond the glare of the spotlight, the reality of their relationship was marked by distance and disconnection.
Bryan, who initially requested spousal support, later filed a motion for emergency spousal support in May. He claimed Rachel continued using their marital finances without sharing access, even though they were still living together amid the divorce proceedings.
"I want to move out of our family residence as soon as possible, but maintaining our standard of living is not financially feasible at this time," Bryan stated in his motion. He argued that his chiropractic career suffered due to their moves for Rachel's career, while her success as a media personality soared.
According to the court documents, Rachel earns $61,019 per month, with monthly expenses exceeding $49,500, while Bryan earns an average of $13,413 per month.
Rachel contested Bryan's claims, stating, "I am not flush with cash, as he believes me to be. And, I certainly cannot pay his attorney $75,000 to litigate our uncomplicated divorce. If I did so, I would not have sufficient funds remaining to pay my own counsel."
The unraveling of Rachel and Bryan's marriage, while sad and unfortunate, serves as a powerful reminder that when it comes to relationships, the fleeting flame and glamor portrayed on reality TV cannot sustain them for the long haul. The pressures of public life, personal ambitions, and the absence of genuine connection can strain even the most promising unions.
As believers, while we pray for the wholeness and happiness of both parties, there are lessons we can also glean from the demise of this relationship to help us build lasting, fulfilling, and God-honoring partnerships.
1. Prioritize Your Relationship with God
Strengthening your relationship with God lays the foundation for a strong partnership. A deep, personal faith can guide your actions, decisions, and interactions within the marriage, ensuring both partners are grounded in shared values and spiritual goals.
2. Cultivate Open and Honest Communication
Effective communication is essential for understanding each other’s needs, resolving conflicts, and fostering intimacy. Regularly engage in meaningful conversations, actively listen, and express your thoughts and feelings openly to maintain a healthy dialogue.
3. Practice Forgiveness and Grace
Every relationship faces challenges and misunderstandings. Embrace forgiveness and extend grace to your partner, just as Christ has forgiven and shown grace to you. This helps in healing wounds, rebuilding trust, and moving forward together.
4. Support Each Other’s Growth
Encourage and support each other’s personal, spiritual, and professional growth. Celebrate successes and provide comfort during setbacks. Mutual support strengthens the bond and helps each partner to reach their full potential.
5. Engage in Shared Spiritual Practices
Regularly participate in spiritual activities together, such as prayer, worship, and Bible study. These shared practices can enhance your spiritual connection, provide mutual encouragement, and keep your relationship centered on Christ.
6. Spend Quality Time Together
Intentionally spending quality time together helps to strengthen your bond and build lasting memories. Engage in activities you both enjoy, prioritize date nights, and ensure you have regular moments to connect without distractions. This time together nurtures intimacy and understanding.
See the former “Bachelor” couple during happier times below.