Are self-esteem issues stopping you from pursuing destiny? Here's how to overcome them.
Photo Credit: Getty/Ilustration By EEW Magazine
By LaKeisha Rainey-Collins // Empowerment // EEW Magazine Online
I had major dreams. Whenever anyone would ask me about my plans after high school, I would proudly say, “I’m going to Jackson State!”
My plan was to attend Jackson State in my endeavor to become a psychologist and pediatric nurse. I applied and received an acceptance letter. But y’all, it never happened. I never even laid eyes on the campus.
I graduated high school with a 3.7 GPA and an Advanced Diploma with Honors. Academics never posed a problem for me; I could ace any class with minimal effort. Clearly, not being smart enough didn’t stop me. I had the smarts, but what I didn’t have was self-esteem.
I had the intelligence but not the inner-confidence.
Retrospectively, I can see where I had a bad habit. I would desire to achieve certain goals, take that initial step, but then talk myself out of the whole thing when it was time to do it.
In my head, I could totally rock out at anything, but when it came time to actually rock, I would stand still and slowly back away. In pretty much every goal I attempted, I found a way to talk myself out of it. I can go down the line.
The rifle team in JROTC.
The dance girl team in 10th grade.
The cabinet of student officers in 12th grade.
College.
A long list of other things that continued into my adult life.
Aside from my lack of self-confidence, it also didn’t help that I do not come from a family of high achievers. I never witnessed anyone around me speaking about or reaching for dreams and goals. I probably have only two older cousins who graduated from college, so who was I to think that I could do it? I had to be crazy to assume I could succeed at anything when no one in my immediate circle had done so.
Truthfully, I can’t even place total blame on my environment, because although I believe environment does greatly affect one’s evolution, it is very possible to become more than what or where you come from.
My issue was my issue; I’m able to own that now. I simply had zero belief in myself, and when you lack confidence, even when it’s something you desire, you subconsciously teach yourself to reject every opportunity for self-improvement.
Low self-esteem is a thief. It robs you of all things good for your life and ultimately causes you to live beneath God’s plan of destiny. It makes me think of John 10:10 (AMP) which says, “The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].”
Satan does not want any of God’s children to do, have, or be anything remotely close to who or what God has destined, because when we walk in the fullness of His plan for our lives, it illuminates God’s glory, and that light then shines into the darkness of lost souls, ultimately ushering them into the Kingdom.
So, the enemy often works in our psyche to turn us against ourselves, using our own low self-esteem as his tool to defeat us. This is why you constantly find every reason why you should not go after something that is really a God-desire.
Think about it: When you want to consume the whole box of cookies, justifiable reasons are not hard to find. You rationalize that you need them, because you’re stressed, you just need a little something sweet, or you deserve it as a treat. But, when your mind says, “We need to adopt a healthier lifestyle,” reasons to reject it pile high. You say you can’t because healthy food is too expensive, you don’t have extra time for all that meal-prepping or working out is not hair-friendly.
You see that? For the thing that’s not-so-good for the longevity of your life, there’s no thought stopping you, but for what is beneficial to your health, your thoughts reject it.
If you really give it some thought, you will see how the thief is robbing you. Good health is part of God’s plan for you, verifiable through 3 John 2 NKJV – “Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.”
“Satan does not want you to do, have, or be anything remotely close to who or what God has destined, because it illuminates God’s glory.”
This is only an example; however, it speaks to the issue of self-esteem, because we only talk ourselves out of going after what we believe we do not deserve. For some, that includes good health.
You can only grow from this mindset when you embrace the truth that whatever God has willed for your life is not a matter of deserving, but of destiny.
What dreams and desires have you rejected because you don’t think you are good enough?
How many times have you initiated the first step in achieving a goal, but then backed away from it because your self-esteem talked you out of it?
How many books, or businesses, or ministries, or good relationships, or amazing ideas are sitting on the shelf of your heart collecting dust, because your inability to believe in yourself keeps your feet cemented to the ground?
What passions have you failed to pursue? How many lives are waiting on you to believe in yourself so that they can receive the impact that God purposed them to obtain from you?
I implore you to give it a second – or fifth – thought. This time, instead of giving yourself every reason why you shouldn’t or can’t, think about (And write down!) all the reasons why you can, and you will. Then, act on it from a mindset that says, I am good enough.
Pursue from a place of knowing that when Jesus carried the Cross, endured pain and anguish, and died, He did it because you were good enough.
Low self-esteem, on your behalf, was nailed to the Cross.
Leave it there.
LaKeisha Rainey-Collins is founder of Beautiful Me Ministries.
